Run by Leona Lewis

I remember that Jo said to me that this song has a nice tune while we were on the way to see Maggie and friends at Coffee Bean by Daos when he was in Thailand. This song is very beautiful darling..just like me hahhahaha... so vain..i know..
............................................

I’ll sing it one last time for you
Then we really have to go
You’ve been the only thing that’s right
In all I’ve done

And I can barely look at you
But every single time I do
I know we’ll make it anywhere
Away from here

Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I’ll be right beside you dear

Louder louder
And we’ll run for our lives
I can hardly speak I understand
Why you can’t raise your voice to say

To think I might not see those eyes
Makes it so hard not to cry
And as we say our long goodbye
I nearly do

Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I’ll be right beside you dear

Louder louder
And we’ll run for our lives
I can hardly speak I understand
Why you can’t raise your voice to say

Choir : Leona Lewis as Lead Vocal
Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I’ll be right beside you dear

Louder louder
And we’ll run for our lives
I can hardly speak I understand
Why you can’t raise your voice to say

Source: http://www.lyrics-celebrities.anekatips.com/song-lyrics/run-lyrics-leona-lewis

From this moment on..

*someone sent me a text saying that he would like to dedicate this song 'From this moment on' to me* Thank you darling... Love you

From this moment on by Shania Twain

From this moment life has begun
From this moment you are the one
Right beside you is where I belong
From this moment on

From this moment I have been blessed
I live only for your happiness
And for your love I'd give my last breath
From this moment on

I give my hand to you with all my heart
Can't wait to live my life with you, can't wait to start
You and I will never be apart
My dreams came true because of you

From this moment as long as I live
I will love you, I promise you this
There is nothing I wouldn't give
From this moment on

You're the reason I believe in love
And you're the answer to my prayers from up above
All we need is just the two of us
My dreams came true because of you

From this moment as long as I live
I will love you, I promise you this
There is nothing I wouldn't give
From this moment
I will love you as long as I live
From this moment on

Happy 13 Month-aversary

Time does fly people and before we know, it's been 13 months since Jo and I got together but the most memorable time happened on last month but very same day (I will never forget that day). Frankly, I feel that I hardly have time for my dippy today and for that I'm so sorry. I got up super early today..well at 6am to be exact to take a shower (even skipped the alms giving because running out of time). Mom and I left home at 7am.to attend P'Joke's monk ordained ceremony (which he is now a monk). Mom and I rushed out because we thought we were going to be late but as it happened..it only took us less than 30 minutes to get to the temple.

The ceremony was quite small in size and people that attended are relatives and close friends. Free prawn/fish porridge were served while mom and I was waiting for P'joke's parents and his siblings shaved P'Joke's hair off. I'm not allowed to participate in this particular activity as people who are older than the soon-to-be monk are entitled to shave his hair off (mom stopped eating porridge and went to cut his hair off then walked back to finish off her porridge hahaha). I can't remember when was the last time I attended this kind of ceremony but it must be quite a very long while ago 'cause I can't seem to remember it. We stayed on until 9.30am and excused ourselves out. Monk Joke's parents were very pleased to see me and mom and I think they are very touched by that 'cause for them we showed up by surprise (P'Joke sent me an invitation via email and I didn't give him a confirmation whether I will go or not).

I have to admit that I was quite sleepy when I got to the car but at the same time I was starving as well. Well, free porridge was nice but I'm not a porridge person plus I kinda felt bad eating while other people doing other things (they had finished eating before mom and I arrived). Since mom wanted to drop by the old house, I suggested that we should drop by Bon Mache Market to grab something to eat and mom agreed hahaha..love you mom.

Traffic wasn't so bad since it was still early and it's weekend so people tend to start their day slower than normal days. I had chicken rice (without skin) for breakfast as I missed my darling so much and chicken rice is his favourite dish you see hehehe. Mom had grilled pork with rice and other things for side dishes. Overall, we had a very full breakfast. We walked around the market for a bit before heading off to the old house. Dad was there but getting ready to off to Nakhonsawan for Amulet competition, bro just got up. Mom picked up some mails then we went to the mall as I had to run some errands before coming home.

Traffic was quite bad at that hours (you can tell that people finally moved their asses out of home and since the petrol price has gone down dramatically, people tend to bring their cars out of the garage -_-"). Mom and I was a bit hungry when we got home, well it already passed lunch time you see hehehe so we had like a nibble food so it wasn't so bad. Mom reminded me about the hair colour set that I bought a few days ago, asking me to do it since P'Tar has nothing to do hahaha. Well, the whole session only took half an hour and now my hair is quite bright but mom said it's a wee bit brighter than the last one. However, I'm going to Kuching in a week time and apparently Jo's parents don't really like it... oh well...it's a bit too late now right and I can't basically dye my hair to black colour on the very next day. I need to give my hair a rest at least 3 months plus I will look super scary with black hair (my original hair colour isn't black to begin with) and it's not like I'm not scary in the first place. Can't lie that I'm quite nervous about meeting Jo's parents but then Jo did it so I have to do it as well. It's going to be a tough time for me but things will be fine...keep smiling Ploy.

No plan for the rest of the night, so I guess I'm going to spend time with mom and enjoy a quiet night missing my darling. :)

Happy Monthaversary darling. I love you.

Not that bright right?!?

Just for you...

Well..someone's been nagging me about where's my next post (my number one fan..no no not my fan..my fiance). So here's my new post on my very own restricted blog *bratty*. Hmm..what to write...help me?!? I guess since Jo left Thailand my life is no difference from a rollercoaster that keeps going up and down. I'm so used to having him around me and when he's not there, I became imbalance. Of course that since he left we tend to argue more, I guess it's because I seek for his attentions and partly sad due to the fact that he's not with me anymore. Nevertheless, I'm happy that he's having a nice time with his family back home and I'm sure his parents and his brother, sisters enjoy having him around too.

I was looking through a list of Thai songs in mom's room a few days ago and found this song and I find it is very meaningful. This song makes me realize that people want to be loved by someone who can accept them of who they are but life isn't a fairy tale where there's always a happy ending. Every couple needs to meet in the middle but in order to do that, it requires a lot of time and understanding from both parties. 'Meet in the middle' sounds so easy but the truth is...it's very difficult to do so because at the end of the day, everyone wants to get what they want but once you manage to meet each other in the middle..the next question is..how are you going to sustain it? and for how long?

Love is not everything in relationship, in fact love is just one part of a relationship. Relationship requires love, understanding, time and respect. My question is, do people have all of those elements? It takes time to obtain all of these things..most people quit before they even try. However, if that person is worth it, you will try your best to achieve them but how do you know that person is worth it? I guess when it comes down to this question, you have to believe your guts feeling. Your feeling don't lie.

The song that I was mentioning earlier called 'Flower and Vase'. The song is basically talking about how do you know that a flower that you see in a vase is willing to be there, not by force. It could be separated from its branches and ended up crying in a vase. Of course the flower knows that the vase cares about it just like how two people who love each other so much do care about each other. The girl knows that the guy loves her so much, he 's always guided her because he cares about her. She also loves and very attached to him but her heart can't deal with it.

When it comes to love, she wants him to accept and love her the way she is. She's been through a lot in her life so when it comes to love, she wants to loosen things up, she wants to enjoy and relax. She wants the guy to love her of who she is not who he wants her to be. No matter how much he means to her or how much she loves him, it has to be changed. It's not that her love is no longer there, it is still there, unchanged but she wants to be left alone at this time to see what life really means to her and when she gets an answer of who she really is, she might get lonely along the way and that's the day that she will return just like how flower belongs in the vase.

That's all about the song. For me, I found that person and no matter we do argue from time to time I still can't face the day without him. My favourtie quote from 'Rumor has it' is "I'm not here to tell you that I can't live without you, I can.... I just don't want to"

So darling... i don't want to live without you. Love you Jo ja ^^

Find my way back...

Do you ever feel like driving out to somewhere that you've never been before and start walking to an unknown place, hoping for a new adventure?

Do you ever feel like walking in the opposite direction in a very large crowd?

Do you ever feel like shouting out loud in a quiet assembly?

Do you ever feel like smiling while walking through pouring rain?

Do you ever feel like me?

Today

Today... I'm tired but ... I am smiling
Today... I'm sad but ... I am smiling
Today... I'm fragile but ... I am smiling
Today... I'm down but ... I am smiling

Because I know that there will be tomorrow where I can smile for no reason.

You found me

This post has nothing relevant to its title. I'm basically stealing the name of the song that I'm listening right now, ' you found me' by the fray. For me, I already found that person and he's sleeping downstairs after his long day and I have to say that my darling Jo is such a brave person (can't stop telling him that today) for getting his wisdom tooth removed even though he hates pain more than anything in the world..but don't we all? hate pain..physically + mentally.

Can't lie that the current situation in Thailand is really pissing me off, no need to mention the fact that we can't make to Japan due to stupid PAD's protesters taking over the international airport and I'm quite worried how Jo is going to make his trip back to Kuching this Thursday. According to Thai Airways website, a lot of international flights have to be made through U-Tapao airport (100 something kms of Bangkok) and it requires at least 5 hours for passengers to proceed the airport prior to the departure time. How crazy is that.. 5 hours!!! I hope all of you will rot in hell, stupid protesters.

*Can't stop looking at my ring finger* yes yes people out there, Ploy is no longer available okay and nobody can ever beat this huge ass rock! yes you got that right..I'm taken (Jo you better be smiling right now you know). Come to think of it, I've been with Jo (as in the same place) for nearly 3 weeks now and it feels so great, of course we have our ups and downs but it seems like we're getting better. People tend to learn things and adapt to it through time and I'm no difference.

Don't know why but today I've been thinking whether I should follow Jo back to Kuching on this Thursday or not hmm.. Well, mom won't be happy that's for sure but then I also need to respect Jo's parents as well since Jo came all the way to Thailand to ask my parents for their permission. Mom will use the present situation in Thailand as an excuse for not letting me go that's for sure but I think I should go... hmm..decision decision decision. I know I will feel so awkward going there but then Jo probably felt the same way when he first came to Thailand as my boyfriend...but now no longer boyfriend you see... yes you better be smiling one more time Jo. Oh well...I guess I just have to think thoroughly and carefully about it.

The world is so crazy now and it seems so chaotic with people killing each other and yes with stupid protesters closing the airport! scerw you scum bags! Honey, if you're reading this..know that I miss you so much even though you're downstairs sleeping, don't want to disturb you because I want your wound to heal so we can play around and go to places together tomorrow. We went to so many places in the past 2 weeks, chinatown, platinum, pimai, P'Jim's wedding (and you look super handsome last night darling).

I know that I ain't the perfect girl in the world and constantly causing you headache but this girl loves you so much and only you wish for the best for her man. I can be the real pain in the arse, and the meanest person in the entire universe...but at the end of the day, I still want a hug from you before I go to bed. I don't ask for much (right... Jo thinks) sure I'm a high maintenance girl but simple things also make me smile. ^^

I love our quiet day where we don't do anything. I love our non-sense conversation which always turns out to be something very meaningful. I love how you can be such a playful person just to put smile on my face. I love how you ask me to drink more or to eat more fruits so I won't have trouble going to toilet. I love how you shower me with a decent amount of sweet words everyday. I love how we continuously fight over who gets to carry 'MY BAG'. I love how you get jealous over small items around my room...I find that is very cute as it shows that I do mean something to you. I know how we trash about our past or how you make random comments about things. Love how you teach me how to play pool, at least now I can hit the ball ^^ Love how you try to teach me new things, you can be a very good teacher do you know that... but sorry student...I'm his ONLY student..sorry I don't do charity work...sharing is BAD!!!!

To be honest, I'm not looking forward for this Thursday but I also need to learn to be more understanding and reasonable that Jo has his family waiting for him patiently back in Kuching. I really don't know what am I going to do in that one month apart, I'm very used to having Jo around and it won't be the same after this Thursday. I know that I will be listening to lonely songs more often...what to do right..music moves me but at the end of the day, I have to remind myself that he's still with me and I still have people here that need me. So smile Ploy and everything will be fine ^^.. Crying over things seem so effortless but smile over it, is much better.